Where were you at in your music career when you had your first child? Was there much discussion about how that life choice would affect your career within the music/entertainment industry?
I got pregnant about 6 months into the pandemic, so my music career had scaled back to live-streamed, audience-less gigs, and online lessons. It ended up being the perfect time to get pregnant as a freelance musician, as there wasn’t much that needed to be canceled or turned down through the later part of my pregnancy, or postpartum, although my daughter joined me at about 5 weeks old for my live-streamed gigs.
Despite the odd nature of things at that time, we knew life would eventually find its way back to some sort of normal, and had many discussions about how things would look. My husband is a musician also, and we agreed that we would organize our schedules as equal partners; keep our working lives as fair as possible. If we both had a rehearsal one night, then the baby would simply come to the rehearsal.
We would figure out how to make it work, and I would never be required to sacrifice more simply because I am the birthing, breastfeeding mom. I pumped. We leaned on our parents (we realize it is a huge blessing to have both sets of parents close by to be able to help out). It’s definitely not easy doing the balancing juggle required to make it all work, but it’s totally worth it.
As a working parent in the music industry, what are some of the biggest challenges you face or have faced?
The two toughest things for me have been scheduling prep time before my daughters have been in daycare, and being absent for a lot of bedtimes and weekends. With unpredictable nap lengths, it is hard to rely on those windows to get things done, which can make life stressful. The time missed is equally as challenging, but for different reasons, and simply hurts your heart a lot more.
What is one change (big or small) within the industry that could make a positive impact for working parents?
In scenarios where there are bigger budgets to allow for extra amenities, like massage therapy for artists, it would be nice to have on site child care.
How do you find support and community with other working parents in or out of the music industry?
When you’re on a gig or on the road there is often a lot of what we call “hurry up and wait”, and for me just simply connecting with other parent musicians during those waiting periods can help you to remember you’re not alone and also helps normalize this journey that is still somewhat uncommon, particularly for women.
What’s one specific example of an organization/venue/company doing something great to help support working parents?
I honestly haven’t had experience anywhere where there is any kind of standard support for working parents, however, all of the companies, organizations, and artists I work for have been extremely accommodating during times of pregnancy as well as when I had a newborn as young as 3 weeks on a gig.
What could a music event (festival, conference, etc.), do or provide to make it easier for you to participate?
Offer childcare services.
Can you shout out another music mama doing great things?
Amber Bauer is an absolute rockstar out of Edmonton making it happen with two kids and career as a freelance keyboard player/vocalist. She is incredibly supportive of other musician mamas and a proponent of the reality that we can have kids and play music too.
